Monday, April 28, 2014
Understanding my role as a Biblical Wife. (Biblical woman series)
This is such an important study for me because being a Biblical wife to Leon is my passion. He's such an amazing husband and my best friend so I want to be all that I can be for him.
Honesty time! I did a no no folks. You see, I've put my Marriage on the back burner for a bit when I became a mama.. It's something that's so easy to do when you're a first time mom in fact I didn't even realize I did it until I read another blog post about it and realized "Oooops! Am I doing that??"
I guess because I got so overwhelmed with a little person and studying her, getting to know her likes and dislikes and making sure that her every need is met that I forgot to make sure Leon's needs were met too.
I've studied blogs and books on being the best mom I can be and leaving my studies on being the best wife I could be in the dust. I stopped trying to please Leon, I continued to get behind on washing his clothes, and keeping his meals fresh and even worse I even stopped praying for him.
That's a mistake that took a little hold on our marriage causing us to argue and it's a mistake that I refuse to make again..
Children are supposed to make a husband and wife grow closer and not farther apart. And I believe the reason why that happens sometimes to couples is because they forget that they were a husband or wife before becoming a parent. And obviously it's not the kids fault but the parents.
Sometimes "we" wives don't run and jump into the arms of our Mr when he comes home anymore because we're too busy keeping our kids happy.
Or we get behind on laundry because we'd rather be blogging on our little break then folding clothes.
Or sometimes we do "take out" way too often because we don't want to cook dinner..
Which is an understandable thing but not a good thing.
As a wife and a keeper of the house I'm called to be a good steward of what I have. I was so blessed to have the opportunity to spend my life with my husband early in life and I want to be a good steward of him and take good care of him.
I'm not saying I'm a horrible wife for getting behind on laundry, or not hugging on him when he gets home from work, or ordering take out when I don't feel like cooking dinner..
What I'm saying is that I shouldn't be making excuses for myself. I get behind on things around that house and I've used my busyness as an excuse. I get so overwhelmed with piles of laundry but it can be prevented. Doing a load of laundry every day and folding it and putting it away is a 30 minute job at the most. And planning a dinner menu the week before would make it so much easier to cook each night of the week and allowing myself to have a break from cooking every once in a while.
So ladies, This wife and Mama has come up with a plan to help me be a better Stuart in my role as a wife and house keeper. I'm coming up with a chart and I'm going to write a schedule of things I need to do each day to make my home a cleaner and happier one for my husband. I know at the moment Evie doesn't mind her clothes piling over but Leon does and I'm going to prevent that and make the piling go away.
And I've started praying for my husband these last few weeks every day again and I'm letting him know. Praying for my husband is the most important thing I can do. We can't grow stronger in our relationship together if our prayer life is on the back burner. I'll be posting more on that next week.
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Love this. THANK YOU for your honesty! I did the same thing when my son was born. It's SO hard when you're only responsible for yourself and then suddenly you are supposed to meet the needs of an entirely helpless baby! GAH! But we got through it- we recognized it- and we came up with solutions. Now my heart is to help other new mama's not make that mistake!
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog on the mommy moments blog hop. I completely agree with this post! It's so hard to find balance between everything, and I felt like I too had put my poor husband on the back burner. I decided to start writing down what I want to get done for the day because it's important to me for my husband to see a little bit of work being done around the house. It also makes me feel good knowing that I'm taking care of him.
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I love that you've been so honest with your readers. And it is great that you realize your mistakes. We all make mistakes, it's how we handle them and learn from them that makes us who we are. I love your passion to be a better wife and mom. I learn from you all the time!
ReplyDeleteEvery night before my husband I and go to bed we bless each other, we say a prayer out loud for the other person. We've been married for 9 years and we've done it every day that we've been married when we weren't apart, and even then sometimes if we can we'll call each other to give each other blessings over the phone. We do the same for our kids, so they know when they are getting a blessing from us they know it's bed time.
ReplyDeleteYou are an amazing wife and mother!! I think ALL of us first time momma's have been there! It's a learning curve (maybe the biggest learning curve we will ever experience?) when we have a baby. And it's okay that it takes time to figure everything out, as long as we DO figure it out! And You have an amazing solution to putting your hubs at the top of your list! I'm definitely going to use your idea and schedule out household duties instead of trying to cram it in to one day (and not being able to finish even half of my list!)
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