Just like with Evelynne I had a feeling this pregnancy was coming. I didn't know when and I didn't even know how considering Leon works nights and I'm with Evelynne during the day. I'm convinced something must have happened when we passed each other by ;)
I'm gonna start out this post by saying God is such an amazing God! He gives us so many reasons not to worry about things and He gives us so many reasons why we should rely on Him and trust Him in all things. And I wonder why it's so hard for us sometimes to trust in The One who has and will never fail or disappoint us?
This journey Leon and I have been on when it comes to getting married at the age of twenty with no money and barely a job, to getting pregnant three months later, and finding out I'm pregnant now has been a journey where we have needed to fully rely on God. And during this journey I am learning more and more that relying on Him isn't a burden to Him but instead a pleasure. He loves supplying for His children their every need and desire. And even though I know these things without a doubt being an over thinker can still cause me to worry about things. Especially when the enemy tries to fill my mind with the complete nightmares he thinks my future should be.. But to this day Leon and I are hanging tightly to the hope and prosperous future God said it will be!
About a year before Leon and I got married God gave me a dream of our daughter Evelynne. Where I got to meet her as an infant. To this day I still remember pictures of that dream like I just had it and that dream gave me the hope and excitement that I was going to be a mama to a beautiful baby girl.
The first February we were married almost three months after Marriage I started receiving dreams and visions of her again. I remember one very clearly of a baby and a word over her was "Faith". I was freaking out a bit inside because I had no idea what was going on. But God quickly laid it on mine and Leon's heart that I was pregnant and He wanted us to remember to have faith because all of her needs will be provided for.
With this baby the same thing happened. In about late March I had a vision that I was in the bathroom and I looked down to see the positive pregnant sign on the test. I couldn't help but start crying and soon after I ran into Evelynne's room to tell her she was going to be a big sister.
Now getting pregnant again and having two kids close in age was my dream. I desire for all of my children to grow up close in age so they could be buddies. But I honestly didn't see a reality in that. For one Leon's night shift schedule didn't make it look possible to start "trying" and two we're still not exactly where we want to be financially.
And God knew that those things would be heavy on my heart so He encouraged me by planting this on my heart.
God encouraged me to dream bigger this year, to dream fearlessly, and to dream without letting anyone else have effect on where I feel led to go. And my dream is to be a stay at home mama. In fact I know that's my calling and anointing. And I believe God wants me to do it fearlessly and confidently knowing that all of the needs that come with this shall be provided for. Because Motherhood is a ministry when you do it for the glory of God.
Around Easter I started feeling sick. I thought maybe I was starting to get sick or something because I honestly didn't think it could be morning sickness. I had taken a test a week or so prior so being pregnant was the last thing on my mind plus I didn't think I could have morning sickness so soon even if I was pregnant but my mother said with hopefulness that it's definitely possible. So I decided if I didn't get my period by my Birthday (May 1st) I'd take a pregnancy test.
The 24th of April came around and I honestly couldn't wait any longer. I had to know and didn't think that six days would make a difference. Plus I was late anyways so I thought why not?
I didn't even have to wait five seconds for it to come up. I looked up, looked down and there it was "Pregnant". I couldn't help but to just start crying with joy. Thanking God once again for blessing us with another child. Afterwards I ran into Evelynne's room, lifted her up and told her she was going to be a big sister! Then I all of a sudden realized this all looked familiar. Thanks God!
I still can hardly believe that I will be holding this new blessing in December! And by Christmas I will be loving on two of my babies.